The More You Have...

My neice and her family lost one of their dogs today. Actually, that's a poor way to describe what happened. Why do we say we "lost" a loved one? Do we share with our ancient forefathers a magical fear of the very word 'death', or is it maybe because we have such a sense of loss that the phrase just comes naturally? They are lost, we are lost without them. We all seem to try to avoid simply using the phrase "he died." We have an entire dictionary of different euphamisms we may use instead of saying someone is deceased: they bought the farm, kicked the bucket, left us, went on, went with the angels, bit the dust, turned his toes up, cashed in their chips, bought the big one, gave up the ghost, croaked, went south, is pushing up daisies, is sleeping the big sleep, assumed room temperature (that one came from a mortician friend), or as Willie S. so eloquently stated "shuffled off this mortal coil."

We can't even bring ourselves to say that we made the choice to end the life of our beloved animals. We say we "put them to sleep," "put them out of their misery" or "had him put down." It's hard to admit you played god and made the choice of who lived and who died. Even when we know we have made the kindest choice we could make for a being that shared our lives and our hearts it's never easy...anyone who doesn't mist or choke up in the vet's office waiting for the blue needle to arrive (yet another euphamism) is a heartless bastard who doesn't deserve to own an animal! For your trivia file, the term euthanasia is an euphamism of sorts, being Greek for "the good death."

When our animals leave us for another plane, we can't stand the thought of them simply ceasing to exist, so we do our best to believe that they are waiting for us at Rainbow Bridge. If indeed there is such a place (and OH! how I hope that indeed there is) I am going to be one happy newcomer indeed when I get there. All of those furry faces so long past, so much loved while they were here, so much missed when they were no longer. My neice says she won't be getting another dog anytime soon. "The more you have, the more you have to lose..." She's right. I remember when my beloved Bookie died, I sat and cried for weeks. The song with the chorus "I always wondered what I'd do without you, now I know.." became my memory song for him, and I still cry every time I hear it. He died at Christmas time, and that was the last year I truly enjoyed decorating. And I'd been a decorating fool up 'til then.

We're still watching Freckles very closely. The vet believes for certain now that he has an obstruction in his esophagus. This can be a recurring thing (not a good long-term prognosis) or it could be a one-time thing, hastened by a bout of colic that kept him from drinking enough to keep his whistle wet (gee, when you get started with these colloquisms, you just can't stop can you?). He's on antibiotics and steroids and supposed to keep on a diet of nothing but grass. I'd love to put him our best grass field (lots of fescue and meadow grass, among a lot of weeds and herbs that have a lot of calories and other benefits) but a recent disagreement with a neighbor who used her love for and superior understand of animals as an excuse to not want a thin one grazing on or near her property (weird reasoning? I thought so too.) has made that impossible. I'll have to get the fence across the road back up and 'hot' and then there should be plenty of grazing over there for all the debilitated and needy guys that are having problems digesting grains.

Odd isn't it how we can let our love for animals override our common sense? Take this neighbor (please). She knows we do horse rescue. If she has gone to our website, she has seen the success stories of what we've done to rehab and rehome abused and neglected horses. She knows I have 30 years experience taking care of animals, and I do so to the very best of my ability, with the aid of an army of vets that not only speak highly of me but consider me a personal friend as well as a good client. She should know that I would never just put a horse out to pasture to starve to death. The horse in question is our "Ethiopian Dan"...thin as a skeleton, and out-eats every other horse in the herd. He can put away a bale of hay a day (square) and 10 pounds of grain...but, he has ulcers which makes it hard for him to digest anything but grass. After spending close to a thousand dollars on special foods, medications, and supplements, all to no avail, the vet said "just put him on good thick grass and leave him alone and let's see what happens." What was happening was that he was actually beginning to gain weight. About 50 pounds (which on a 16.2 horse doesn't show up much, but does matter) in 2 weeks to a month. For now, to avoid further issues that can't end well, instead of debating property lines and the simple stupidity of some of her reasonings, Dan has been moved temporarily to a paddock where he's eating hay again. In her very insulting letter to me explaining her disgust and requesting that he be moved, she informed me that he shouldn't be in that pasture at all..."he needs hay and love." Actually, hay is not good for him at all, and he never was without the love. But, as I said up there somewhere, it's easy to let our love for animals take over our common sense. Or maybe any sense at all.

Anyway, the pasture in question is just a few acres, and it floods in the winter anyhow, so the horses will all be much happier across the road in the 20 acre field with its bermuda, fescue, and 7 acres of small trees that are growing up where timber was cut a few years ago. We would love to put some of our goat herd in there to help clean it up, but Tucker the Donkey is a goat-o-phobic and tries to kill every one he sees. So, we'll see how fast the horses can clear it out, and if they're not doing it fast enough, we'll let Tucker visit with Elizabeth the Cow for a while and let the goats take over the big place.

I love letting the horses and goats and cow graze down a meadow that hasn't had anything done to it in a while. All the natural plants are beginning to come back, there's no chemicals within acres, and I know that for a while at least, they are truly getting to live "all-natural."